Dear Younger Me Series: Dae'l
What is your name and tell us a little about yourself.
My name is Dae’l Pasco, the wife of Darrell Pasco, and the mother of Zariiah. I am a writer, encourager, and pusher of purpose. I enjoy all things girly, pink, fluffy, fashionable, and glamorous. And Jesus Christ is my best friend, in which I learn, embrace, and share all truth. I’m pretty chill; However, I enjoy having a good time, laughing, and challenging myself in the “uncomfortable things.” Personal development is something I take seriously and I find great delight in living and operating in excellence, at all times. When I’m not ministering, or tending to my affairs at home, you can find me on the beach, shopping on the web, learning, reading, or in your nearest city- relaxing in a hotel room, binge watching episodes of ‘Martin,’ and YouTube videos.
What challenges or difficulties did you have growing up as a young girl? What changes or differences have you noticed now about life and society, compared to when you were younger?
As a young girl, I faced many challenges that altered my outlook on life. The first challenge that comes to mind is being misunderstood. Although many could pinpoint my outward expressions- or the lack thereof- because I was extremely quiet and timid… Many had no idea the struggles I dealt with internally. Being molested at a young age opened the door to sexual perversion in my life, which I found myself exploring much more in my preteen years and beyond. Growing up in a home where I’d often hear my mother and father physically fighting began to feed that sexual appetite as well because, I turned to pornography and masturbation as a way to “release” my internal feelings, with hopes of escaping the dysfunction and trauma of it all. I found that my voice was snuffed out from a young age and many thought that was just who I was, not realizing… If they’d just taken a closer look, all of my habits were speaking of what I felt I couldn’t say. From biting my nails- no matter how much I got spanked for it, to shutting down and isolating myself, my addiction to sexual perversion, the ways I’d decorate my room, my expression through art, need for silence and even song, my obsession with violins and guitars because of the peace I’d feel when playing them, going from straight A’s to F’s, and many other things. All of this made it difficult for me to pinpoint my true identity because I was so gifted and talented but, never stable. For years I struggled with my “why” as a result of being able to do many things, quitting when I felt led, suppression, and diving into even more with little to no supervision or actual guidance.
How have your experiences from your childhood shaped who you are today?
Life has changed drastically since my youth. I often tell my daughter how my friends and I would be outside from sun up, until sun down- living in Alaska gave us more time outside in the summers because the sun stays up much longer than in the lower 48s, and in the winters it would get dark much sooner, so our parents just understood the streetlight rule didn’t really apply. I’ve noticed how we were much freer back then… Although children were being abducted, rapes were happening, and many of the unfortunate events that we see today, were taking place then… There wasn’t such an evidence of fear or worry- even with parents. As children we were able to go out and enjoy meeting friends, without fearing kidnappers. We were aware of them but, not “controlled” by their existence. Now, I see how much traffickers and many others control, without even being seen. As parents we are much more on edge because, we want to make sure our children return home- which is a given. And with technology being readily available and advancing as it is, the social life of children is becoming extinct. Which is heartbreaking. However… God always has a plan and purpose, and I have great hopes for our future generations.
As contradicting as my life was, I always tell God how grateful I am for it all. I grew up as a military child, and joined when I got older- bad idea, great experience. I didn’t get to serve long but, even in that I learned much about myself. I left Alaska (where we stayed for 14 years) and moved to Florida. Upon my arrival, I began to really take my relationship with God seriously. It wasn’t always all butterflies and flowers, but I’ve learned so much about myself by giving my heart to Him. There are many things I told God I’d never do; Such as: Marrying someone named Darrell, my husband is Darrell, I told God I hated teaching, and would never… I teach women every single week, and there are many other vows of “I will nevers” that I’ve had to repent for. Now God uses all of my life’s experiences to pour into people, push them into purpose, intercede on behalf of my family, friends, peers, assignments, and the world, I see how the anointing on my life to break perversions power from others is used by God, and how my love for fashion and beauty draws people too God by their curiosity, building of esteem, and basic conversation. Me being a single mother for 10 years, marrying after a crazy experience in a “friendship with benefits” has helped me to relate to both women, men, and children in ways I never knew possible. Everything I’ve ever experienced is being used for God’s glory and I unapologetically walk in the authority and power He’s given to me. I look back on the many nights I’d cry and ask God to keep me asleep, still mustering up the strength to say, “God if I wake up, please use this pain to help someone else,” and now, all I can do is smile and thank Him for His faithfulness and love. He’s my best friend and the healer of my heart.
If I could tell my younger self one thing I would say…
Dear Younger Me,
Believe in The God you’re sensing every moment of your life, and trust Him with your whole heart because, He can’t and won’t fail you. He’s graced you for such a time as this, and He is going to blow your mind with the way He transforms hearts through your obedience and love. None of your story will be wasted. As long as you’re pleasing Him, nothing else matters.
I love connecting with others and am available on the following social media sites and webpages:
Instagram: daelkpasco
Facebook: Dae’l K Pasco
E-mail: hello@daelkpasco.com
Personal Blog: DaelKPasco.com
YouTube: Dae’l K Pasco
Business: TheWomanhoodAcademy.com